Gaming Addiciton

This question was posed to me by a concerned parent, worried that her sons gaming habits are becoming an unnecessary behavior. Without myself being able to get into detail about how this parent’s current lifestyle is, I will convey a certain blanket-style mentality for the answer to this question.

I respect that there is a huge amount of opinions to be had by the interpretation of the word “addiction.” In my research on this topic, I have found that most people have been quite rigid with their responses regarding this matter. Nearly all the individual answers I have found to this type of scenario was, “Go see a Medical Professional and have a diagnosis” or, “just ‘right-click’ and hit delete.” Now those 2 options are reasonable to an extent, but be prepared to deal with some fallout in the relationship. No matter what age your child is there will be a period of negativity between you that will need to be endured. It all depends on how stubborn a parent could be. I speak to the parent of the situation in this specific manner because I vouch for the Gamer in this scenario first and the Parent second.

 

I oppose most of these answers given by the community, because it is easy to delete a game. Nearly all the answers given by the community that I have found didn’t reference, or attempt, to teach a lay-man individual how to clearly confirm that an addiction has been created, and that another version of intervention may be needed.

 

Now I wouldn’t call my self an individual that investigates the lifestyle that comes with a Gamers behavior patterns if I didn’t deliver a version of understanding. Remember, this is only a top-level assessment of why this question, and consequently, the mentality of the situation would even happen. Also, the question being asked isn’t specific enough for me to dive in any useful direction. Maybe if there was a question concerning a specific act that can be closely associated with your Gamer’s behavior, I would be able to give you a specific and tailored answer to you query.

 

The perspective I will shed light on is the “act of assessing” that you see a person suffering from a gaming addiction. From what I have seen in my life I have found 3 different types of “Gaming Behavior” that would be most evident in a Gamer. Please remember that all Gamers have different mixes of preferences. In my life I have not seen any one Gamer exhibit any one of these behaviors completely.

 

1.      The Gamer is consumed with the act of playing with others or alone. In this situation there can be a healthy relationship that a Gamers has that you don’t see. Understand the level of emersion that happens within any game that your Gamer may experience. Understanding this perspective will not only allow you to see if your Gamer is being sociable to an extent, but you can also see a version of decision making style your Gamer exhibits.

 

As an observer what you will see is who your Gamer speaks too, and how your Gamer can handle co-operative situations. The situation could be helping your Gamer deal with others in certain situations, akin to real life situations. Don’t worry I will be getting to the “meat and potatoes” of addiction.

 

2.      The Gamer is consumed with playing only one specific game, and never deviates from it EVER. This version of Gamer has a much higher chance of exhibiting increased addictive behaviors.

What you will see will be clear and compelling amounts of immersion. So compelling to the point that you may notice that your Gamer uses the same language (Including off-hand verbiage) used in the game. This can lead to some pretty weird interactions. This is dependent completely on what kind of game they are playing.

 

3.      The Gamer that is concerned with how a Game works. This Gamer not only loves playing just one game, but also enjoys finding every piece of information about a function in the Game. How the lore behind each element of the Game is created. Most importantly, the Gamer has no problem switching to other games if the reasoning is compelling enough.

 

After playing Destiny, and working through Destiny 2, you won’t find me switching to any Sims games in hopes to find a better story or amount of content.

 

Let’s be real, what you think is addiction is the fact that your Gamer said “no” repeatedly to multiple types of request and you are getting “fed up” with it. There is a good chance your Gamer is in the middle of playing a game when you ask for something, which resulted in a “no” from your Gamer. Whether or not your Gamer has stepped away for a quick moment and isn’t near their machine when you make a request. This could be caused by a few reasons. One example is some games are set up so you can’t just walk away. They may need to complete what they are doing until their progress is saved, so they don’t lose the progress put into their game. In some situations, the Gamer cannot walk away due to how the Game is set-up. This may make you feel like your Gamer is only thinking about the Game and not you or the things requested of them.  

 

I have sad news for you, this isn’t addiction. What you are really dealing with is a collection of decisions that did not lead to the fulfillment of what you want as a Parent versus the fulfillment of what your child wants. Read my article on the 6 Basic needs of a Human-being here. You will develop a clearer understanding of what I mean. If you do not read my article on the 6 Basic needs of a Human-Being, this concept of understanding addiction will not stick with you.

 

Without the information of a medical professional, here is the definition of addiction. Addiction is being attracted compulsively to repeat any action, attaining a specific result, without any regard to all other facets of life. Eventually leading to a value-less perception of worth in the subject’s life.

 

If you want to be a rock-star in your Gamers life, you need to do 1 of 2 things.

 

1. Simply accept that your Gamer has the tendencies of a person that could have an addiction. Then make a decision that can cause your Gamer to drift away from you, possibly physically and emotionally.

2. Join in, ask questions to understand better about what they are doing, and be a part of your Gamers life online, even more so offline.

 

Please realize that you can generate a greater understanding of what content your Gamer is experiencing by participating.